I was at a live event the other day where speakers who had presented then got together to form a panel. The panel had a 3:2 majority of women speakers. The audience were then invited to ask questions.

The audience was split about 60:40 in favour of men. Obviously a white man asked the first question. And the second. No women raised their hands to ask a question so a third and fourth question were also asked by white men.

I raised my hand to ask a question and highlighted the fact I was the fifth white man to be asking a question and how disappointing it was. Thankfully women did start raising their hands and did ask questions.

When I mentioned it there was a murmur of discomfort around the room. Good. This is a great example of how we need to call things out. I’d guess it is likely every man there was involved in some form of International Women’s Day activity. Similarly, if you asked them if they were sexist they’d argue they weren’t.

I know I can expect to hear replies to this along the lines of ‘women didn’t have questions’. That is blatantly untrue; I was approached by numerous women afterwards to thank me as they had questions but didn’t feel confident to ask them. Similarly, the women audience members sought out the speakers afterwards to ask questions of them directly.

The men I spoke with afterwards were surprised by my intervention and highlighted why this stuff matters.

They didn’t realise what was happening and that men were dominating the Q&A. Men are dumb to this stuff. Men don’t know the impact of their actions (or inactions) in spaces like this.

Be better.

#ItStartsWithMe